What the Well-Dressed Groom is Wearing

Q.  Our original July wedding was delayed to November by health concerns (and then venue timing). Originally I was wearing a white tuxedo. Will this still be okay in the fall?

A.  Few occasions in a man's life are so full of questions as his wedding day. "What do I wear?" is high on the list. The bridegroom's dress code is specifically prescribed; it is a strict set of rules with only a very few variations allowed. Do it right. 

In formal attire, the white tuxedo you mentioned is a contradiction of terms, unless what you meant is a white dinner jacket. This dapper garment is one of the few variations/alternatives allowed in black-tie attire; it’s a nice summer-time-only substitute for black tie’s formal black jacket. If you already bought yours for your earlier planned wedding, you should not wear it after Labor Day.     

The groom’s clothes are determined by the formality of the wedding, the time of day, and the time of year.  Even today, the degree of formality of the wedding is designed more by the bride than the groom. The bridegroom should definitely OK what he's planning to wear with his fiancée well in advance. This is neither the time nor the place for surprises.

Traditionally, weddings are either daytime formal, evening formal, black tie, or informal.

For a daytime formal wedding, the bridegroom wears a cutaway coat of dark, oxford gray wool (known as a morning coat). It is accompanied by an ascot. For an evening formal wedding, he wears a black tailcoat, white waistcoat (vest), white wing-collar formal shirt, and white cotton piqué bow tie, known as white-tie-and-tails.) Most men have so few occasions to wear either of these two outfits that it's wise to rent them from the most conservative rental agency in town -- one that does not go in for innovative or "creative" pretensions.

At informal weddings, the bridegroom wears a beautiful, well-cut dark suit, most often navy blue, a fine white broadcloth cotton shirt, and a silvery-toned heavy woven “wedding necktie,” tied in the standard long four-in-hand or half-Windsor knot. An informal summer garden wedding with natty Eastern Seaboard overtones might involve a dark blazer and well-cut white trousers.

At all times of the year, the most popular category of wedding wear is between these two, known as black-tie attire. The black-tie suit is often referred to as a “tuxedo,” although in the most elite social circles, this term is not considered elegant. It’s been said that a man dining on New Year’s Eve in a grand restaurant is wearing black tie, while the waiter is wearing a tuxedo . . . even though they are both dressed the same. Weddings called for after dark are often black tie affairs -- for the bridegroom and for the male guests, as well.

The most important point about black-tie dressing is that it makes a man look wonderful. If he has even one occasion every year or two to wear it, he should strongly consider owning his own, rather than renting. Essential to black-tie dressing: all the details (lapel type, trouser type, shirt, bowtie, accessories, etc.) should correspond and be appropriate.

A black-tie suit need not be expensive. It should be classically cut, tailored to fit well (currently, on the trim side), and ideally made of 100 percent lightweight wool.

Basic black-tie suits are fashioned in three collar and lapel styles:

·         Shawl (traditional curve cut, used only on formal wear)

·         Peaked (most dashing, usually found on double-breasteds) or

·         Notched (least formal, a daytime-business-suit cut).

Lapel fabrics are either:

·         Satin, a silk-like, smooth, glossy fabric, or

·         Grosgrain (pronounced “grow’-grain”), a ribbed twill fabric, also known as faille (pronounced “file”).

Jacket closings are single- or double-breasted. Probably a double-breasted should not be your first and only evening suit, because it will come and go in style.

Trousers have a ribbon that matches the lapel material -- satin or faille – running  down the outside of the leg. They are cut straight, not tapered; worn with braces (button-on suspenders), not a belt; are accompanied by a cummerbund or a waistcoat (vest); and have a small break. Incidentally, formal dressing is the one time when cuffs are never worn.

Shirts are always white with either a standard turn-down point collar or a wing collar. Historically, the wing collar was only correct with white-tie tailcoats, but it is so dapper and flattering that it is now widely accepted.

Shoes and socks are black. So is the bowtie. That’s what makes it black tie.